WARNING: Due to the graphic descriptions and adult themes in the following story, reader discretion is strongly advised as the content might prove to be offensive to some readers. IN SOME INSTANCES, NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT THE INNOCENT............................... (AND PERHAPS THE GUILTY TOO!)
If you remember me writing about "Bob" (Chapter Six), I had decided to start accumulating parts in order to do a restoration on that poor, old, tired, tractor, hopefully sometime in the near future. (In my world, that equates to sometime within the next five or ten years.) Anyway, one day, as I was scrolling down through the photo ads on YTMAG.COM, I came across a "Farmall B Parts Tractor" (at a real good price for a "parts tractor") that was located in the town of Elmer, which is located in, "The People's Republik Of New Jersey" so I emailed the fellow that had it and got more information. After a few emails back and forth, we struck a deal and he agreed to hold it until I could come for it. One day, I said to "The Old Girl", "Hey Jan, we need to set up a date to take a trip to the scenic town of Elmer in "The People's Republik Of New Jersey" to pick up a parts tractor which I bought to use when I start to restore "Bob". Now, for those of you who have been following this series of stories from the beginning, you will note a definite change in my strategy on how to break the news of getting another tractor to "The Better Half". I would like to think that I had finally worn her down to the point where she finally realized that, "she wasn't going to beat them, so she might as well join them" but then maybe it was because this "parts tractor" was being brought home to be used in the restoration of "Bob", which was her daddy's old tractor that he had given to me some years ago. Maybe the truth was that it was a combination of both of these things. Anyway, she went online and booked us a room for a night at one of the better motels in the area and on the appointed day, away we went to Elmer. The town of Elmer turned out to be an old, quaint, little town tucked into the farmland which dominates the southern part of The Republik. This time, I didn't even have to borrow a trailer. I had my own. Nothing much of interest happened on the trip up or back but I did learn a costly lesson about using a GPS and following the route it suggests. From now on, I will be sure to tell the lady that resides inside the GPS (and who continually nags and nags, "If possible, make a legal U turn." or "Turn right NOW!" or "Recalculating, recalculating.") that I do not want to use toll roads if at all possible. The trip up cost $39.00 in tolls. After reprimanding Zelda, and telling her NOT to use toll roads, the trip home cost $8.00. (If we could have figured out a way to get across the river without using The Delaware Memorial Bridge, it would have been cheaper but $8.00 is a whole lot better than $39.00.) A few weeks after we got home, I started looking this tractor over a lot closer. Other than having a blown engine, the tractor looked pretty good. It had good rear tires, good sheet metal and it did not seem to be missing any parts. Still, something was not right with that tractor. I found the serial number tag, cleaned it off, took the info and headed for my Farmall Data Book. The "Farmall B Parts Tractor", turned out to be a "Farmall BN Parts Tractor".......HMMMM. I really thought that with this tractor, my quest was over but now, in addition to finding a new engine for the BN, I still need to find a source of parts for "Bob". The decision is not 100% at this time but it is around 90% and if I do decide not to use this tractor for parts, "Elmer" will have found a new home. With the aquisition of "Elmer", I guess that I have probably collected my last "new" old Farmall........BUT ......"HAY, YA NEVER KNOW"! ("Hay", pun intended.) What,... what,... what's that you say? You know somebody with a Hebard Shop Mule? Do you have his phone number?...................
(To Be Continued)